And I am tired. And grumpy.
And sick and fricking tired of dealing with constant MISTRUST. We don’t want bad things to happen to people. We do our very best within the limitations of the system. We do not deliberately hide things from people. There is not always time for hand holding, sometimes we just have to get on with things. Things are not always clear and we sometimes have to change our minds, and yes, we lose sleep over it.
The mistrust does not actually help the cause. Also, just because bad outcomes happen, it doesn’t mean we have caused them.
I am content with just having no argument or hostility from families. When we actually get a thankyou, we are pitifully grateful.
Anywho that is my rant.
I am grateful to have a fantastic resident who is very helpful.
My boss is alright – she is a bit dizzy – she gets her knickers in a knot and I am not convinced she would be of any use in a real crisis. I have dealt with all the fracas this week.
She was asking me today about my parents. I told her that my dad died when I was 14. She asked “what of” and I said “this is a story for another day” (read: none of your fricking business – I don’t discuss it very much, but it was not a straightforward heart attack put it that way)
And she said: “oh, you were 14, it’s not like you had him very long anyway”.
What a DUMB FUCK thing to say!!! Idiot.
I am lucky with my lot in life and don’t feel resentful about the absence of a father figure – this does not mean I do not feel the loss acutely at times, such as at my wedding, fathers days, at times when I just want somebody to protect me. And also, when people say DUMB FUCK things like that.
Onward and upward, as always.
I am happy that Joooolya is prime minister. I hate Tony Abbott with an almighty passion, more than I did John Howard. But crikey moses did Rob Oakeshott bang on and ON! Still, he has a nice, trustworthy face.
I went for a run this morning, pretty piss poor (ok 3km), my foot was sore and it was all puddly (I hate puddles, I am such a girl). My plan for SIS 1 is to do my best, to run a negative split and run the whole way, and whatever time I get, I get. It is all practice for the real day 10/10/10.
I have been good with the eating a good lunch. Eating mindfully etc.
I am looking forward to the weekend. Hump day tomorrow.