It’s OK (really).


I got to work today, completely buggered after the weekend…

Then 2 family meetings…..The families that require FMs are often angry for one reason or another….often undercurrents of grief and guilt but disguised as anger toward the treating staff (medical, nursing and allied health). Sometimes the families have a point, sometimes the problems are unavoidable and I always try to remember that the patient and the family are the ones suffering. Therefore I never get angry back and try to cop as much of it on the chin as possible.

But still, it grinds me down. It makes me tired. Takes the wind out of my sails.

It’s OK.

I am allowed to feel like that. I used to try and push on throughout the day, not acknowledging the stress I felt.

So I let myself feel tired and stressed. I asked to go home early. And you know what, I feel better for it. Finally allowing myself to be human. I used to try and push on, despite the most horrendously stressful day, and feel guilty when I finally cracked. I would hide in the toilet, crying, humiliated, hoping that nobody saw my red eyes. Grey’s Anatomy, it ain’t.

I am lucky that I am in a specialty which is a bit less stressful, which allows time for a rest and debrief if I need it. And one of the nurses, who felt sorry for me working over the weekend, bought me in some cake that she is made. It was pear, almond and custard and YUUUUMMMMYYYY. Bless her.


I went to training tonight, Coach Paul off with his new baby, we had coach Rod. I had a good chat with him afterward. A very tough session, including drills, strength and hills. I enjoyed it but I think my left ITB is flaring up a bit. Will have to cross train, spend some quality time with a foam roller and whoop those VMOs into shape.

The Candy Files.

Cute/clever things candy has done:

  • learn to jump up into our laps.
  • roll over for tummy rubs 
  • Sit in front of me, head on my knee, and gaze up at me with her doggy eyes. (I melt)
  • Learn to go to her dog-mat or into her kennel when we point to it.
  • Learn to sit (sometimes) when she is told

Not so cute things she has done

  • Gotten into the garage, jumped up on my car, and put pawprints and scratches on it. 
  • Learned to jump up on the bed. (though it is rather funny when she wakes Hubby up)

but I love her. And Hubby now walks her (and therefore exercises) without being forced. Wonders never cease!

Better go wash off the running stink

4 responses »

  1. g’day miss sassy, what about 8.30am this saturday? yep brunny to flinders st sounds good. i’ll stash some cash in my waterpack for the train ride back to the car. 19K sounds good. I’m chomping at the bit to run long! i’ll text you tomorrow to see where to meet you etc.

  2. My dear you are a carer and must remember to look after yourself, it is a tough job but I am sure you know that. It’s good to see you discovering how good pets are at stress relief, just before my kitten was making me laugh chasing a screwed up piece of paper about like a soccer ball.

    I worked 18 months in a call centre, I know what it is like to be ground down to a dot, especially when people are basically spending all day taking their anger out on you, I cried often, thank goodness those days are behind me.

    Rod’s a good sort, he makes you work hard!

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